I’ve been traveling the country with the Dove Self Esteem Fund as of late, doing self-esteem workshops for middle school girls and train-the-trainer workshops for the dedicated adults in girls’ lives. So far I’ve hit San Diego, Seattle, Denver, and Kansas City. Next stops, Detroit and Charlotte. Dove is partnering with local Boys & Girls Clubs in each city to round up the girls–usually about 100 per workshop–so the audiences tend to be primarily low income.
One of the exercises I ask them to do is fill out a “self-esteem bubble” in which they list all their influences (mom, dad, Spongebob, Lil’ Wayne) and then strategically place them. If the person is generally a good influence, they place them inside their bubble. If the person doesn’t make them feel so hot about their self-esteem, they place it outside of the bubble.
For such a simple exercise, it really produces fascinating results. As I walk around the room, I get this very vivid picture of these girls’ lives with just one little circle on a paper. Uncles and fathers are too often FAR outside the bubble, in the opposite corner of the paper. Last week, Barack Obama was in many, many girls’ bubbles, right next to them in big letters. Many struggle on where they should put their sisters and brothers–one day they’re inside the bubble, the next they’re out. So much of the media they voluntarily consume is outside the bubble when they take a sober look at it.
So what’s in and outside of your bubble?
You are amongst those in my bubble. Great post. xox
God, my bubble is so different now than it used to be…
I used to hang out in other people’s bubbles, thinking that if I made them feel good about themselves, they would make me feel good about myself. Didn’t quite work out.
When I put myself in my own bubble and started to love myself more, I attracted way more people into my bubble. Now all I have are people who make me feel good. I’m not talking about people who build me up and let me go on living in delusion, but people who mirror me in a kind and honest way, people I trust, people who encourage my growth and have my back, people who love me.
It’s hard when you’re young to attract that if you don’t feel that, which is why parents are such important leaders/teachers. You had good leaders/teachers. Thank you Jere and Ron!
I am so glad you are leading and teaching now. The world is a better place with you in it, Courtney Martin.
Thank you for being in my bubble!
xoxo
I’d be really curious to hear how the Detroit leg of the Dove tour goes, since that’s my hometown and I’ll be there next week.
Hmm…good question about who’s inside and outside of my bubble. Food for thought.
Thanks for your kind notes Carly and Kimmi. I’m proud to be in your bubbles! And you are both in mine, of course.